Ever see “Date Night” with Tina Fey and Steve Carell? Well, there’s this part in the movie where she’s finally being honest and she talks about how sometimes she just wants to run away to a hotel room and sit alone all day in silence. With nothing but her and the sound of the air conditioner humming. Tonight that might be me…
Parenting is not for the faint of heart. Period. Sometimes my role as ‘Mommy’ fills me up. It’s my joy. My deepest longing. And if we’re being honest…on other days it sucks me dry. Dry as a desert. I go from ‘baking homemade zucchini bread’ Mom to ‘don’t make eye contact’ Mom. It’s human. To have on days and off days. It’s human to love deeply. And it’s also human to get super annoyed when your beautiful Child has called your name no less than 1,000 times in the last 3 minutes.
Why am I telling you this? Not a clue. Maybe on the off chance that you might have ever felt this way. Maybe once you’ve wanted to hop in your car and drive cross country just to sit in silence for a few hours. These precious faces are mine to love and cherish. A job I try most days to hold dear. An honest to goodness privilege. But sometimes, just sometimes, I want to be reminded that my identity isn’t just wrapped up in Mommyhood..I’m so many other things too. I’m a Wife. Daughter. Sister. Friend. Photographer. And sometimes I’m just me. Just Stacy. With whatever complexities and twitches I might have. I’m flawed. Selfish. Slightly crazy. I’m also the most loyal Friend you could ever have. I value deep, meaningful, connected relationships. I love sunshine. A huge glass of ice cold tea. I love swimming. Biking. I love going to movies. White cake with white icing. I love horseback riding. Dogs. Hoodies. Flip flops. Walking barefoot on green grass. Palm trees.
Yes. I am Mommy. But occasionally it’s nice to remember I’m so much more too….
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